Week 2 Day 4: Self Acceptance Exercises

Week 2 Day 4: Self - Acceptance Exercises

As we continue to talk about acceptance I am sure you have begun to become aware of either how much you do or don't accept yourself. This process takes time, so please be gentle and kind with yourself. This is the first step to accepting yourself! Today I am sharing with you two really cool exercises that are going to help you achieve your own self acceptance.

Part of accepting yourself is accepting your body. In a society where body image is everything and it seems only the rich and super thin can achieve their dreams it is no wonder that so many of us feel like we fall short in comparison. First we must realize that comparing ourselves to others is truly a matter of comparing apples and oranges. We are all such individuals there is no comparison, we all bring something different to the table. The Mirror Exercise is the first one. This exercise is tough and can feel very intimate, but it is a great way to gain body acceptance. In the Mirror Exercise you will stand naked in front of a full length mirror and by using the power of the mind you can re-train you subconscious to truly accept your body, by repeating out loud: "I accept myself, in this moment, just the way I am." The full instructions to this exercise are posted below. As you are participating in this exercise notice the ease at which you are able to accept your body and say words of acceptance with feeling and emotion. Really believe what you are telling yourself. Accepting gives you power and can promote a meaningful change in your life. Say, "that is me and I accept it." Then be motivated to change, if that is something you want to do, and believe it is possible!

The next exercise is designed to help you deal with the negative thoughts that run your subconscious. I hope that as you have been taking more notice of who you are, you have begun to also notice that our subconscious minds can really torment us. We make a mistake or hurt someone's feeling and automatically our subconscious is telling us what a bad person we are. We lose our job and all of a sudden we are a failure. We base our self worth on our actions and behaviors instead of on who we truly are. People make mistakes, it is how we learn and grow, but we can't learn and grow if we can't accept our mistakes and move on without putting ourselves down. We have to learn how to not be so hard on ourselves. Heck I know I am awful at this, I never feel like it is good enough, but that is just my subconscious , which is already programmed to tell me so. It is easy to allow our bad behaviors to defined us, but in reality we are neither our good or bad behaviors. We are neither good people or bad people, we are all people, beautiful people who all deserve love and self love. Below you will find this exercise as well.

Take time to do both of these exercises and always take notes. It is great to go back and see where you started so you can see how far you have come!

1. Mirror Exercise: www.anunda.com

The Mirror Exercise: Simple Instructions

1. This exercise will achieve the maximum benefit if repeated at the same time every day for a period of about 10 to 15 minutes. The most powerful times are at sunrise and sunset.
   
   The second most beneficial times are first thing on getting up in the morning and last thing before going to bed at night. If these times are impossible, then you can set aside two other times for you when you will not be disturbed.

2. You will require a full length mirror with a space in front of it so that you can stand fully naked in front of the mirror and be able to see the whole of your body.
   
   The room should be of a comfortable temperature so that you are neither too hot nor too cold.
   
   In standing in front of the mirror, place your feet "shoulder width" apart .. so that, if you were to draw a line straight down to the floor from the outside edge of your shoulders this line will touch the outside of your foot. Allow your weight to be evenly distributed on each foot.

3. Spend a few moments taking in the whole of the reflection of you, and then focus your attention on a point on your forehead, exactly between your eyes and about 2 cm or 1 in above the line of your eyes.

4. During the whole of this exercise, the mantra which you should repeat to yourself (out aloud so that your body hears your voice) is
   "I accept myself, in this moment, just the way I am"
   
   I have written this "mantra" in English, but you will gain a greater benefit if you translate it into your "native" language - and if your mother spoke another language or dialect when you were in her womb, the use of this translation will also be beneficial.

5. During the whole of the exercise, place your hands, palms pushed together in front of you. As you initially do this, feel the pressure on your palms, up through your arms, across your shoulders, back and chest. This is the pressure between left and right, male and female, past and future.
   
   Somewhere in the centre, you will (with practice) find a space of "no pressure" - this is the centre of your being and it will be somewhere in the middle of your body in a direct line with your visual focus on your forehead. [ more on the significance of the hands ]

6. During the whole of the period, you should "imagine" that on one breath cycle, you are breathing in through the top of your head and filling your centre then breathing out through the soles of your feet.
   
   The next breath cycle is the reverse - in through the soles of the feet to your centre and out through the top of the head.
   
   As you breathe, allow your sense of hearing to focus on the sound the breath makes as it moves through your body.
   
   During the breathing, allow the out-breath to release any thoughts, impressions and feelings that may arise - using the in-breath to "fill" the empty space created by the release of the thought.
   
   With practice, you should be able to find a gap between the in-breath out-breath in-breath and you may find that you "drop" into it. You cannot create this "gap". [ The Breath that is you ]

Comment.

It may be necessary to practice this exercise a few times before it "happens" by itself and all of the stages "fall" into place. Do not look for any outcome - just practice for the practice and, after a certain time of releasing all of your discomfort, the practice will "do you".

When it does this, you will know and the experience will be yours alone. I have seen people heal from incurable cancers and all sorts of other physical and mental illnesses from following this practice "religiously" every day for years .. and it is still my own practice …the most complete and the "simplest" in the long run. (Mira's Story)

Please Note: If you consciously use this exercise to involve another person for ANY reason, the probable outcome is that you will immediately take on every subconscious and unconscious dis-ease that the other person may be afflicted with. There will be no personal healing benefit for yourself and what you will "take on" is almost irreversible.

This mirror exercise is between yourself and your own naked reflection.

2. Self -Acceptance Exercise www.smartrecovery.org

SELF-ACCEPTANCE EXERCISE

Instructions: This exercise is designed to help you challenge the belief that if you've failed at something, or if someone criticizes or rejects you, you are a totally hopeless failure.

To overcome your irrational thinking leading to low self-acceptance, complete the top half of the circle by filling in the appropriate spaces with pluses (+ 's) for the things you do well at work or school and with minuses (-'s) for the things you don't do so well. Then complete the bottom half of the circle by writing in things you do well and things you like about yourself, as well as things you don't do well or don't like about yourself.

REST OF LIFE

To counter the tendency to put yourself down when things aren't going so well, ask yourself the following questions:
Does this bad situation (mistake, failure, rejection, criticism) take away my good qualities?
Does it make sense to conclude that "I am totally hopeless" because of one or more negative things that have happened?


THOUGHTS TO HELP INCREASE SELF-ACCEPTANCE


1. I'm not a bad person when I act badly; I am a person who has acted badly.
2. I'm not a good person when I act well and accomplish things; I am a person who has acted well and accomplished things.
3. I can accept myself whether I win, lose, or draw.
4. I would better not define myself entirely by my behavior, by others' opinions, or by anything else under the sun.
5. I can be myself without trying to prove myself.
6. I am not a fool for acting foolishly. If I were a fool, I could never learn from my mistakes.
7. I am not an ass for acting asininely.
8. I have many faults and can work on correcting them without blaming, condemning, or damning myself for having them.
9. Correction, yes! Condemnation, no!
10. I can neither prove myself to be a good nor a bad person. The wisest thing I can do is simply to accept myself.
11. I am not a worm for acting wormily.
12. I cannot "prove" human worth or worthlessness; it's better that I not try to do the impossible.
13. Accepting myself as being human is better than trying to prove myself superhuman or rating myself as subhuman.
14. I can itemize my weaknesses, disadvantages, and failures without judging or defining myself
by them.
15. Seeking self-esteem or self-worth leads to self-judgments and eventually to self-blame. Self- acceptance avoids these self-ratings.
16. I am not stupid for acting stupidly. Rather, I am a non-stupid person who sometimes produces stupid behavior.
17. I can reprimand my behavior without reprimanding myself.
18. I can praise my behavior without praising myself.
19. Get after your behavior! Don't get after yourself.
20. I can acknowledge my mistakes and hold myself accountable for making them -but without berating myself for creating them.
21. It's silly to favorably judge myself by how well I'm able to impress others, gain their approval, perform, or achieve.
22. It's equally silly to unfavorably judge myself by how well I'm able to impress others, gain their approval, perform, or achieve.
23. I am not an ignoramus for acting ignorantly.
24. When I foolishly put myself down, I don't have to put myself down for putting myself down.
25. I do not have to let my acceptance of myself be at the mercy of my circumstances.
26. I am not the plaything of others' reviews, and can accept myself apart from others'
evaluations of me.
27. I may at times need to depend on others to do practical things for me, but I don't have to emotionally depend on anyone in order to accept myself. Practical dependence is a fact! Emotional dependence is a fiction!
28. I am beholden to nothing or no one in order to accept myself.
29. It may be better to succeed, but success does not make me a better person.
30. It may be worse to fail, but failure does not make me a worse person.